In a previous article, Intrusive Thoughts: What Are They, and Should You Be Worried?, I described intrusive thoughts: thoughts, images, memories, or words that keep coming up no matter how hard you try to control them. They can be disturbing, and most people find that trying to stop them doesn't work for long.
This article is about how to deal with them. You won't find ways to get rid of the thoughts here — and that's on purpose.
When you let your thoughts come, stay, and go on their own, they lose most of their power. They usually become much less bothersome, and they often show up less, too. But that's a side effect, not the goal.
Notice and name
Find a comfortable place to sit and close your eyes. For this whole exercise, you're a neutral observer. It can help to imagine you're a visitor from another planet who has just arrived in a human body. You have no idea what's "good" or "bad" here, or even what's "normal." You're seeing everything with fresh eyes and curiosity.
The point is to get a little distance from your thoughts and take them less personally. That alone takes away some of their power.
Start by spending a few moments on your breath, noticing its natural flow without trying to control it. Then move your attention up toward your head. If it helps, picture yourself sitting in a dark movie theater, watching the screen.
Now let your mind do whatever it wants for the next several minutes. Your job is only to watch what it shows you, without looking away and without distracting yourself.
As things show up, name them with a little distance:
Say "My mind is showing me a memory of…" or "I'm noticing a memory of…"
Say "I'm noticing an image of…"
For this exercise, it isn't "you" having the thoughts — it's your mind. You're just noticing what it shows you. Keep going for several minutes, then finish with a minute or two of focusing on your breath.
Distort the thoughts
Another exercise is to change how your thoughts look or sound, on purpose. Have you ever stood an inch from a TV screen? You lose the picture completely and see only tiny pixels. Or listened to a song sped up, or in reverse? It sounds odd, and the song feels completely different.
Again, let your mind show you anything it wants. When an image comes up, freeze it. Zoom in so close that all you see are blown-up pixels. Then back up and change its color: black and white, sepia, oversaturated. Try rotating it, too.
If the thought is mostly words or sounds, change the voice. Raise or lower the pitch, speed it up or slow it down, add a silly soundtrack. Then play it in fast-forward, and then in reverse.
The point isn't to get rid of the thought or change it for good. It's to see it from a different angle, so it loses some of its grip.
Thoughts are just thoughts
Finally, remind yourself that thoughts are just thoughts. They aren't something you need to control, and they aren't necessarily a reflection of who you are or what you intend. Thoughts can be random, and sometimes they make no sense at all. A lot of the time, it's just noise your mind produces.
A good rule to remember: a thought you have no intention of acting on is just a thought. You can let it be there.
If intrusive thoughts are taking up a lot of your day, you don't have to work through them alone. You can read about how I treat OCD, or get in touch.
